I’d love to say yes, but why I don’t...

Sometimes people reach out and ask me if I’d be open to supporting them face to face rather than in the online (video) format that I have structured my work around.

In these moments, I wish that I could say yes! But there are reasons why I don’t say yes, and I’d like to share just a couple of these…

• My clients get to be in their natural environment, and so do I.

We know that people can do well with skill building in their natural environments. But let's add another layer to this. In case you didn’t know ;), I’m autistic with hearing loss, and so to be at my best, and to offer my clients my absolute best, I need to create the right environment around me (as well as having my clients in their comfortable environment).

• I have particular sensory challenges (and needs), and when I’m in my own environment working online, I can fully control the smells, the temperature, the feel of the furniture, and the light in the space (amongst other things). Once I step outside of my space, or let someone else into my space, I can no longer predict what the sensory environment will be like. And if I can’t predict or manage the environment to work FOR me, then I won’t be able to support my clients at my best. We operate at our best when we feel at our best.

• My hearing loss impacts me at a functional level, and environmental noise can make it hard for me to hear. Varying speech patterns, including loudness and tone of speech, can also make communication very challenging for me. When I’m in a space where I can control the environmental noise, I’m better able to work at my best. And when I work online, I can access captions to help with communication as well.

• Transitions are tricky! And I’ve certainly been there and done it before, in terms of community-based appointments and having clients come to see me in an office-based setting. Moving myself from place to place (for community-based appointments), or having people physically moving in and out of my workspace is exhausting for me. There are so many steps involved that others might not think about, but trust me, they’re there.

When I log in to an online appointment, I don’t need to navigate traffic, timing of travel, car parking, walking to and from my car, the weather outside, or remembering to bring my notepad, computer or other resources with me. Not to mention ringing a doorbell and wondering who will answer the door from the other side…

When I'm online, I also don’t have to navigate unexpected layers of social interaction and the steps of physically inviting someone into my space, and seeing them out at the end of their appointment. Instead, with the click of a button, we are on the screen, I have client information and resources at my fingertips, and I am thinking clearly and ready to go. And I can breathe easy knowing that at the end of the session we can say goodbye and I don’t have to think through the best way to walk my client to the door (maybe not awkward for others, but definitely can be for me).

• Importantly, I work with autistic, ADHD and other neurodivergent clients, and much of what I support people with is truly understanding themselves and their own needs in this world, so that they can build knowledge and skills to help create a life that supports them to be their best. If I say yes to working in spaces where I don’t operate at my best, then I’m not modelling what I hope my clients can find for themselves! May we all find spaces to be our best,

Elissa 😊